A PERFECT LOVE STORY THAT INSPIRES MY OWN

Today is my 12th Wedding Anniversary to Raylan - our 13th Anniversary as a Blended Family. Unlike a lot of second marriages we chose to celebrate our marriage in a fashion that mirrored one of a first marriage rather than a second or third. Our thought was - it was a celebration of our love so why should we feel ashamed that we had to travel through a number of obstacles to get here! If anything those obstacles have made our love even sweeter.

Raylan and I are celebrating our anniversary this year in Calgary, Alberta, Canada with my sister-in-law and her extended family. Calgary and our family here hold a special place in our heart - this was where we got engaged. This past week we have been reminiscing about memories we've shared these past twelve years. One of my favorite memories was when we meet my nephew Frank, my niece and their family in Italy four years ago. Our kids are close in age and share similar interests so it was a perfect fit.

Frank was born and raised in a small village in Italy, but moved to Calgary when he was a teenager. Every few years he returns home with his own family to visit his hometown. We were extremely honored when Frank invited our family to join his on the visit four years ago.

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WHY DOES LOVE BETWEEN A MOM AND CHILD BECOME WRONG WHEN YOU ATTACH STEP TO IT?

I've been in a blended family for 13 years now and I am continually amazed at the judgement from some Bio Parents, a vocal minority(I'm hoping), expressing judgement over LOVE, specifically in reference to the Mom/child relationship I share with my Step Kids.  

The notion that love between a parent and child is somehow wrong, disrespectful and/or disloyal to a Bio Parent if the love exchanged is between a Mom and kid has a Step or Bonus attached to it - drives me mildly insane! Insane because STEP or BONUS doesn't change the feeling of love or its legitamacy between the parent and child. 

My three kids - Period!

I could ramble on about my relationship with my Step Kids, specifically my two youngest and all the reasons why sharing the parent/child relationship is a good thing for everyone involved, but I won't! Instead I'll talk about my own daughter who was thrust into a divorce and blended family situation by no choice of her own.

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EASTER BUNNY SKIPS HIDING THE PLASTIC EGGS THIS YEAR!

The Easter Bunny skipped hiding plastic eggs at our house this year - opting for an Easter gift. In years past, if we didn't have the kids - the Easter Bunny usually made a surprise visit the weekend before or after.  You can click here to read a post I wrote last year about how we celebrated the Holiday.  

This morning Raylan and I slept in late - woke up - looked at each other - commenting how nice it was that we hadn't been up all hours of the night assisting the Easter Bunny only to be woken up two hours later by three screaming kids - "The Easter Bunny came!!!!"  

Over the years the night before Easter had become shorter and shorter thanks to Jax.

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WHAT I THOUGHT I KNEW WHEN I AGREED TO MARRY MY HUBBY......

When I agreed to marry Raylan, we had been living together for six months - attempting to blend our three youngest on a 50/50 schedule.  Halle and John were living together in an apartment nearby and Chris lived with his Mom an hour away - spending the occasional weekend and part of the previous summer.  I thought I knew exactly what I was getting into when I agreed to marry my Hubby. Then life took over and I realized I knew nothing about the life I had chosen. 

As many of you know, two weeks after our engagement Raylan got a call one Sunday afternoon and by nightfall his 13 year old son was living with us full time.  He brought his suitcases packed full of baggage from a life I played no part in.  As he slowly unpacked  - so did the problems he brought with him. 

When we welcomed Chris into our home - it was a home that had yet to figure out who we were as a married couple, as parents, as a family. We had no traditions, rules or foundation to draw upon - we were still exploring the possibilities of what our family could be. All glaring signs that Raylan and I were in no position to successfully handle the challenges Chris would bring our way.  As a result our new marriage was born on life support. Our survival - touch and go for many years. 

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THE SUN SETS IN THE WEST

Last week Raylan and I made a trip to Kauai to sell the contents of our vacation condo we owned before the new owners took possession. As much as we would have loved to keep it - it was quickly becoming a choice between our kids College education or a home we visit once a year.  

It seemed like a no brainer thousands of miles away - until we walked through the front door - It looked AAAMAZINGGGG! Tears started to well up in my eyes as I looked around - a rush of memories came crashing down on me like a gigantic wave.  Maybe it wasn't going to be as easy as I thought..... 

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